As a rule, I don’t bother watching TV anymore. I used to. Back when there were good shows and they were on at a predictable time. After my work schedule had gone all over the place, and so did the shows with network jockeying for reasons to cancel the good ones by putting them on times no one could find them, I became less interested. (Oh, sure, I could have recorded them. If I knew when they were on, etc.) Also, I constantly am coming and going from the room so often, I don’t bother asking anyone to pause whatever is on because it isn’t that important to me.
This does not mean I don’t watch TV. When my husband has run out of books to read, he watches it non-stop. But if he’s not keen on the show, he will start going through the guide while the show is up in the corner. So, while I’m not looking, he’ll start going through the listings and opening up the show synopsis. I walk in, look at the synopsis, look at the screen. The show might be some gangster looking thing, but the synopsis is talking about the plight of a cheerleader who lost too many sequins. Or something bizarre. He usually has to confirm that no, it’s not the description for what he’s watching.
Better yet, he changes the channel altogether between commercial breaks. We go from OMG Dramaz to OMG Sharknado. Or something equally incongruous. “Is this the same show?” “No, dear.” “Uh huh. Okay.” But now I have these mismatched ideas matched up in my head. And I wonder why people look at me oddly sometimes. But only sometimes.